i love a guy....... and he asks me out... but we juz knew
each other for 1 and a half days... but i know that he's a good guy but he
seems not to ''love'' me yet, what should i do!?
-- = sophia
Accept. It's not a contract. If you get sick of him once you know him better, you can break up with him. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
Hello... what can I say, I guess this is another one of those
romance drama sobfests you've probably heard a little bit too
frequently.
A fairly brief while ago my boyfriend broke up with me, 3 days before
Christmas, to be exact - and I'm still recovering from the shock and
hurt, because I've always thought we were doing perfectly fine. We were
together for a little over 7 months, and have only had a grand total of 2
arguments during the relationship. I've never been so happy with anyone
in my life, and he seemed very content of being with me as well. It
seemed like a bloody fairytale romance, as pathetic as this sounds.
The day he decided to break it off with me, he was still very sweet. He
even said it while we were laying on my bed and holding each other. I
couldn't cry then, even though he was bursting into tears. I felt like I
had to be strong for him, so I held him while he cried and asked for my
forgiveness, telling me that he shouldn't have gotten into a
relationship with me because he's unstable (although it never seemed that way to
me). In the end he asked if he could still have my friendship, because
I'm the most valuable person he has in his life, and he doesn't want to
lose me. He looked like a hurt and confused little boy, and I wanted to
protect him with all I had, so I said yes even as I felt my heart
breaking to a million pieces.
We still see each other, we're best friends. And funnily enough, he
still treats me as if we were still together. He still holds me, tells me
I'm beautiful, holds my hand in public, and even pecks on my lips
occasionally. The only differences are we no longer have sex, the deep
lingering kisses are gone forever, and he sometimes tells me to find someone
new, because I deserve better than him.
As weird as this situation seems, we're not hormonal teenagers who are
together solely for the sake of sex (mind you, we had a healthy sex
life). We're two mature, stable young adults. Granted both of us have
slight depression and low self-esteem problems, but we try and help each
other. And I honestly have never been as happy in my life before. I've
had previous relationships, but I was never satisfied with any of my
romantic partners, males and females alike. With him, I felt happy and
loved, and I never wanted it to end.
Even now I don't really understand what made him want to break up with
me, but still linger in my life and tell me he won't let me push him
away, unless that's what I really want. That's actually what I want, but
I don't think I can hurt him, and I don't think I can still live
without being with him in one form or another. Sad, I know.
I had a breakdown the moment he left my apartment after the break up. I
haven't left home since. I've been lying in bed, crying, and replaying
the memories I've had with him in my head over and over again. I
haven't even eaten or slept for a few days now. But every time he comes over,
I try to put on a smile and act happy despite of the hollow and broken
feeling I have.
The question is, should I just disregard his feelings the way he did
mine, and tell him to get out of my life, or continue on pretending
everything is peachy while dying a little bit more with every breath I take?
He's the most beautiful, sweetest, warmest person I've ever known, and
I still can't get over him. It hurts to even think of him, but memories
flit around in my head every time I try to forget him. Please help me.
All of my close friends were shocked and horrified when they heard
about the break up, but they think I might have another chance with him, if
I give him some space and time, and try again at the right moment. But
I don't know. I've lost all hope, but deep down I do know I want to be
with him again. What should I do? What can I do to get over him?
-- = Dita
That's a very interesting story. Let me begin by saying that if you might have another chance with him, pretending everything is ok isn't necessarily the way to win him back. Take this chance to be brutally honest. If he really didn't want to lose you, if you really were the most important person ever, he wouldn't have broken up with you. Before you consider staying friends with him, he owes you a very detailed explanation of why he broke up with you. And then you can evaluate that when you decide whether to keep being friends. Tell him to quit touching you because it's meaningless now. I, for one, would feel like a woman of the night if a boy kept touching me after he made it clear he doesn't love me. I think it's time for you to have a fight with him and get this all off your chest. You need space more than he does. If he tells you that he doesn't deserve you, agree. To his face. Nobody should have to deal with someone who would play those sort of mind games except people like him who like to play them. And you are never going to be able to be just friends. Ever. So you might as well tell him it's all or nothing. You can try with the best of intentions and it won't work.
Unless he's gay. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
Cheese has always been one of my favorite things too eat, but
as of late I have been eating more cheese than usual. This is due to
the abundance of cheese at my house and the total lack of cheese up at
college. Though I am happy that I have such a lovely selection of
cheese, those damn commercials do not tell you the true power of cheese.
During a period in which an endless amount of cheese was ingested I went
probably 2 days without releasing the shit demons within me. However
when the day came for these demons to be exercised, they came out with a
vengeance. I shat probably 7 times within 4 hours, and these were not
small shits. I'm talking about 20 minute shits that leave you feeling
tired and sore. Well anyways, here is the problem. In order to stop
the flow of evil from my anus, which is now sore, I began consuming more
cheese and keeping trying to control the flow of demons through the
power of cheese. I am still shitting, but not at the rate I am use
d to. I am soon going to have to leave my cheese haven and I am
worried that when I do I will not be able to leave the royal porcelain
throne for days, leaving my ass sore and classes unbearable (more so). Do
you have any advice as to what I should do?
-- = Mr T.
Well, Mr. T., keep eating that cheese. It's great for your bones. If the shit demons aren't leaving, drink a little scotch. That might get the bowels a-movin', and if it doesn't, you'll be too tipsy to mind! Hahaha. And just because you are shitting at a new rate doesn't mean you're shitting at a wrong rate. As far as I'm concerned, less is better. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
should i go for the guy i was in love with but is a raging
alcoholic who won't talk to me or the sweet shy guy who is adorable & i
feel great around?
-- = rae
The second one. You were in love with the first one and you presently feel great around the second. That he's adorable is just a bonus and the alcoholism doesn't really enter into it. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
My best guy friend that I secretly have a crush on, confessed
the same feelings to me. I want to be with him but two months ago he
told me that he loved my best girl fiend. How do I know this isn't just
a phase? should i get with him?
-- = Jane
The best way to make sure it isn't just a phase is to date him and draw him in. If he didn't date your friend, then it's likely that after two months he got over her. He sounds like he's over her either way. And if you have a good relationship for two months before he gets over you, that's two months you spent better than doing anything else. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
So, I have this guy friend, and we tend to be very physical
just in terms of lying/leaning on each other, arm rubbing, etc, in our
(platonic) day to day relationship. He's got a sort of weird, undefined
casual relationship with another girl anyway. I was going away for a
few weeks and when I was saying goodbye to him, I gave him a peck on the
cheek and he seemed quite startled (but not, like, disgusted or
anything.) The few weeks are almost up...what should I do when I see him
again?
-- = Liesl
Depends what you want from him. But if you want a dating relationship, it seems like that's possible. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
There's this girl and she lives on the other side of town.I
don't have a car,I'm 17 and with not alot of money and no ride.We just
talk on AIM and thats it because shes always too busy to talk on the
phone and when she is on AIM,she makes me wait and just signs off without
saying a word.She says that I've been her crush for like a month
now,but she has not seen me since.She never tried to contact me until a
couple of days ago.She says she wants to be with me,but I don't think she
really does.What should I do?
-- = JG
I don't think she does either. Treat her like she might develop into something good later, but isn't going to work right now. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
Dear Advice person,
My problem is simply that i have a problem... im so0o0o0o stupid!!
I laugh about everythingggg. I mean you could say look at that plant
over there and i would crack up for like 2 hours! And i dont know why. I
dont do any drugs i swear and i think theres something extremely wrong
with me ... I dont have ADD or ADHD either and it just bothers me. Oh!
and my voice! its soooo annoying. But im the only one annoyed by it.
And i also have little sayings and expressions im OBSESSED with... and
they change frequently. and thier stupid things like "ya fat fuck" and
"your horrible" and "blah blah blah ima dirty tramp" and "you whore" and
"Bitch go make me a sandwich!" and see i say these things like times
in every sentence!
What the hell is wrong with me! i know your not a doctor but i trust
you ALot please email me! Your AWESOME!!!
-- = *cOnFuSeD*
You sound boring but laugh at everyone. And that means boys are going to fall for you left and right. -- Eleanor Roosevelt
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thanks diaryland