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you probably get this a lot, but could you direct me to a

site that teaches how to make online quizzes? thanks!

-- Cari

Search google for "Quizilla." -- Eleanor Roosevelt



Dear Laura (or Ellie...i'm not sure who anymore),

i have a problem. there is this guy named mike. he saw my pic at a

friends house-and stole (literally, broke into her house) all the pictures

of me he could find. he found out where i live-and he is ALWAYS calling

me, asking me to dump my boyfriend, and threatening to have people beat

him up if i dont dump him. he doesn't understand that i don't want to

be with him. i tried to explain it-but it doesnt work. i am getting

surgery on the 26th, and he is coming to visit me-i dont even know what

this guy looks like-or what his last name is. he is stalking me. is this

enough to get a restraining order? or will i have to stick it out and

hope nothing happens like scenes from 'fatal attraction'..although i

didnt sleep with this guy. thanks!!

-- Melissa

It's Ellie. It's always Ellie. That guy is crazy. Get a restraining order. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



What happens when the guy your friend likes starts to stare

at you in a weird way? He started to look at me when she was talking to

him or when I was eating. Besides, I didn't like him that way, or any

way, for that matter. But he's gone now, so I don't have to worry

anymore, right? And my friend and I are still friends.

Alligators are cool. Yeah.

-- Christine Raee

You tell him "quit staring at me." -- Eleanor Roosevelt



Should I eat cheese or rice with my dinner?

-- Sondra

I fear my response may be too late, but eat cheese. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



Im gay and my best friend found my gay porn and dildos. What

do I do?

-- Chris Price

Say "yup, that's my porn and dildos. If you wanna borrow it or anything, just ask." Don't lend him your dildos though. It's unsafe to share them. But don't bother being ashamed. If he found them by searching through your stuff, you should get a new friend though. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



I'm about to enter highschool or have already, I'm worried

about my grades, what do you think I should do?

-- Jenny

Your homework. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



My boyfriend is a seventeen-year-old with the mind of a

five-year-old. He gets annoyed and angry really easily, and all my friends

are agitated by him. Could you please call upon the space mutants to

re-arrange his brain?

Much thanks.

-- Gonzo

No, I don't know how to contact him. But since you wrote, I'll try to rearrange yours. Just break up with him. That might cause him to grow up. Why shouldn't he act 5 if he can be indulged by his girlfriend? -- Eleanor Roosevelt



First of all, this site is awesome. I would like to hear

some original bad advice so do i have to give a real problem or can i make

up some abstract "this alien from mars molested my cow" problem just to

hear ur horrid advice? i would love to know.

-- = Bobbi

Fuck you. I give great advice. It's the problems that are lousy. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



I just cant get over my embarassing moments.

-- = Untelling >:D

Why not? Everyone else has gotten over your embarassing moments. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



someone knows my credit card number

-- Cosmo

So call up the issuer of the card and have it changed to a new one. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



I'm so sick of the morally conscious advice I've found for my

particular problem in magazines. Anyways, I'm totally obsessed with a

teacher, and I'm wondering...would it really be THAT BIG A DEAL if I

acted on it? He's really hot, but is married with children older than I.

Also, school is out and he's not my actual teacher anymore. What do I

do??

-- anon.

If he's married with children, he probably doesn't want you and you'll just embarass yourself. He'll probably get in a lot of trouble for having a fling with you. Do you care about getting him in trouble? If not, go for it. If he doesn't want one, he can turn you down. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



okay i am sad because eleanor will not be giving advice she

is very good at it but onward with the problems my ex-best friend is

evil and i tried to be nice to her for my other friends and she is mean to

me behind their back i sent her a really mean email after she sent me

one i want to konw if that was right. okay now problem two i dont miss

my ex but i still like him but i dont want o get back with him and i

want to kill myself just for thinking about him because he is sincerely

evil how do i stop feeling this way.and problem three this is not a

problem for lots of people but guys wont leave me aloneevery where i go

they"holla" at me and i used to like it but not so much now cuz they are

all conceited about it i have tried being nice i have tried being mean i

have tried embarising them in front of their friends i have even tried

kicking hem in he balls none of which work help me please!

-- Krystal

Who says Eleanor isn't giving advice? Is your exboyfriend Joe He fits the description of being evill, and you type like his exgirlfriend. It was ok to send your exfriend a mean email. You should just get boys to buy you things. Then when they're out of money, get new boys. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



My friend is being a cow 2 me...she says that i ignored her,

but i didnt! i answered! she wont talk 2 me except 2 b a complete and

utter bitch...and shes supposed 2 b my best friend! its been like this

for 4 dayz but shes not usually like that...help!

-- duckie chick

Tell her "I've tried talking to you, but I give up. If you ever decide to quit exacting revenge for a crime I didn't commit, call me and we can be friends again." -- Eleanor Roosevelt



i got a dvd during my vacation somewhere else and when i test

it there, it played. now when i want to watch it, it wont play at all.

and it's not because it's from somewhere else, because the other 2

discs that's along with it plays too. and the disc's not blank. please help

me to make it play again!

-- stacy

I'm an alligator, not tech support. I don't even own a tv. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



Can you help me? I've lost my shoe. o.o;

-- Tanya-sama

No. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



Hey,

I'm just more curious than anything else.

I'm thinking of going into Phsyc. and i was just wondering what it's

like.

It sounds rather interesting, but yea... i was just wondering what it

was like from the perspective of a student, rather than a councellor

etc...

newayz!

Good luck with everything, and i must say i love your site. The quizzes

are entertaining, the photo's are interesting... and i have of yet to

read enough of ur writing to offer an oppinion.

good luck with everything

Susan

I am not a physc student, or even a psych one, if that's what you meant. Psych majors are all crazy, and that's why they major in psych. If you are crazy, you'll fit right in. Some psych majors are snobby about being psych majors. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



i'm sort of in a tough situation here! i am dating my older

brothers best friend...but he doesn't know about it. age is really not

an issue, it's just a number...he's 3 years older then me, but we both

feel the same way about each other, & this has been going on for ..well,

a a couple years at the very least. i want to NOT have to keep this a

secret from certain people, but i know that they would disapprove & who

knows what they else they would do! i'm not sure how i should approach

this situation, but i do know that i don't want anyone to get hurt as a

result of poor circumstances. any advice?

thanks doll.

xo

-- kel

You've been doing it for years? Just tell him. Or quit hiding and let everyone figure it out when they see you holding hands. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



ok I want to know how to give my bf a really god blow job but

I dont know how to do it. Do you?

-- sophie

1) Don't use teeth. This is why alligators never give great blow jobs.

2) Your mouth is not a cunt, so don't just go up and down on his netherpart. Use lips and hands and your tongue. But not your teeth. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



im i weird?

-- janelle

Probably not as weird as you like to think you are. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



I recently broke up w/ my boyfriend and he still hangs out

with my group of frinds and talks to me online. I don't think he gets

the hint that a friendship after this relationship will never work. How

do I tell him that w/o telling him that? I hate being mean.

-- Katee

Just tell him you don't want to be friends. You either have to tell him, act so mean that he gets the hint, or put up with him. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



one of my best guy-friends asked me out, and i said yes. the

only problem is, i found out from someone that he's extremely happy

about it, and it freaks me out a little, because i discovered that i

really don't like him all that much (being the moronic ho-bag that i am, i

never stopped to think about that). is there anything i could possibly

do to get out of this date or let him down easy, but still keep him as a

friend?

-- = so confused

No, probably not. I think you fucked up. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



the guy i love thinks im a stalker

-- cordelia

Love is requited. You are a stalker. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



ahm, i have a crush on my friend, but shes straight. i havent

told her. and i cant get her drunk and get ass then cause shes

straightedge... plus i just wouldnt take advantage of her like that. shes

really really pretty, and also just such a good friend. fuck fuck a duck. im

screwed. also, how long are you allowed to have a crush on someone

before the authorities declare it love, or at least an obsession?

-- i dont think i have a name... how odd

Love is requited. You have an obsession. You could ask her if she wants to fornicate. I'd say about half of your friendship is based on the hope of this encounter, so you don't have all that much to lose. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



ellie,

i have backne. i've tried human remedies, but it doesn't seem to be

working. do alligators have this problem? if so, how do y'all solve it?

-- rose

We don't have this problem, but if we did, we'd solve it with sandpaper then vinegar. -- Eleanor Roosevelt



I know, I know, there are too many requests for dating

advice, but here I go anyway:

I have an incredibly sweet and caring boyfriend who I usually adore

being around, but my problem is that at random moments, I become utterly

disgusted at being touched and my boyfriend is very affectionate. I

don't normally mind this at all, but sometimes I start to feel as though

I'm nothing more than an object being handled and I just want to get

away.

I was raped about a year ago, and now, sometimes when people are

physically close to me, I feel just almost non-human...

My boyfriend and I are good friends ontop of everything else, but

sometimes it's just easier to be close to him physically than emotionally

(considering that he can't always relate to what I'm feeling and I'm not

always good at explaining it), but I always end up hating myself and

feeling dirty if I do anything intimate with him, which creates a

problem...

Is there any hope for me?

-- Shattered

Does he know all this? Try telling him, and when he's being too much, tell him to back off. He should understand. You can probably work through this together. -- Eleanor Roosevelt

 

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